The end of a marriage can bring about complex emotions, from sadness and grief to anger and frustration. When you want to divorce with minimal conflict, however, you can take steps to maintain a good relationship with your former spouse.
These strategies can help facilitate smooth settlement for your divorce even in the presence of contentious issues.
Reframe your thinking
The media often portrays divorce as a battle. Instead, try to envision yourself on the same team as your partner. You want to work together toward a common good: a happy, healthy life for both of you even when you are no longer together.
Ground in the present
Even if you have angry feelings toward your spouse because of events or behavior from the marriage, you can take steps toward healing by letting go of those old wounds. Sometimes, acknowledging and expressing those emotions in a safe environment such as therapy will help you move past them. Focus on what you want to achieve for your current situation, as well as for any children you have together. Make a mental list of goals for the immediate and short-term future, and strive toward accomplishing those goals with the cooperation of your former partner.
Consider alternative divorce pathways
Your divorce does not necessarily have to involve a courtroom. With mediation, a trained, professional mediator helps you, your spouse and both your attorneys work together to resolve contentious issues. Kentucky law encourages the settlement of many civil matters, including divorce, with mediation as long as neither party has a history of domestic violence.
Kentucky will grant a no-fault divorce to either spouse for any reason. The spouses must separate for at least 60 days before filing for divorce.
If you will have an ongoing co-parent relationship with your former spouse, family therapy can help you adjust to the new roles. When you do not share children with your former spouse, you can seek therapy during the divorce to manage your own emotions, relieve stress and work toward mental well-being.